Social Skills Training for Children: A Behavioral Approach

Social Skills Training for Children: A Behavioral Approach

By Odell Vining, Ph.D.

In today’s world, the development of robust social skills in children is more crucial than ever. Not only do these skills influence peer interactions, but they also play a significant role in shaping a child’s self-esteem, academic performance, and overall well-being. As a Christian behavioral psychologist, I believe that every child is endowed with the potential to develop healthy social habits. Here, we’ll delve into the behavioral approach to social skills training for children and how it aligns with core Christian values.

1. Understanding the Basics of Behavioral Training

Behaviorism focuses on observable behaviors, emphasizing the role of the environment in shaping behavior. In terms of social skills training, this approach involves:

  • Identifying specific behaviors: Pinpointing the exact behaviors that a child needs to learn, be it taking turns in a conversation, listening actively, or showing empathy.
  • Modeling: Demonstrating the desired behavior for the child.
  • Reinforcement: Providing positive feedback when the child displays the desired behavior.

2. Christian Values and Behavioral Training

Christian teachings emphasize love, patience, kindness, and understanding, which align seamlessly with the goals of social skills training. By integrating Christian values into the behavioral approach:

  • Children can be taught to see others as God sees them – with love and without judgment.
  • They can be encouraged to practice patience and understanding, even when it might be challenging.
  • The reinforcement process is not just about rewarding good behavior, but also about nurturing the child’s spirit and understanding their inherent worth.

3. Practical Steps for Social Skills Training

a. Role-Playing: This is a powerful tool where children can practice new behaviors in a controlled setting. For instance, role-playing scenarios like sharing toys, starting a conversation, or resolving conflicts can be very effective.

b. Positive Reinforcement: When a child displays a desired behavior, reinforce it with praise, a small reward, or even a simple acknowledgment. This will motivate the child to repeat the behavior.

c. Real-time Feedback: Offer constructive feedback when a child doesn’t display the desired behavior. Instead of focusing on what they did wrong, highlight how they can improve.

d. Group Activities: Group settings, like Sunday school or group therapy sessions, can be platforms where children practice and hone their social skills.

4. The Role of the Family

It’s essential to note that while formal training is beneficial, a child’s primary social environment is the home. Christian families, guided by love, patience, and understanding, can play a pivotal role in social skills training. Regular family discussions, game nights, and even shared chores can be opportunities for social learning.


A behavioral approach to social skills training, rooted in Christian values, provides a holistic framework for children’s development. It ensures not just the growth of competent social individuals but also individuals deeply rooted in love, patience, and kindness. With consistent efforts, we can equip our children to navigate the complexities of social interactions with grace and empathy.

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